Go for the good vibes. You really can't throw a rock here without hitting some icky Civil War, civil rights, or anti-Native American history. They can't consent to your treatment of their graves and I doubt anyone has ever looked up the families of the buried and asked permission. The bride had traced her lineage back to that plantation. Black Americans are still trying to recover from the effects of slavery, followed by the Jim Crow era, followed by redlining, and the list goes on. Zoo? J is African American and is pissed off and wrote a nasty email about the wedding being there when they may have owned slaves. Does it matter if you have family interred at that cemetery? But I will say that everyone knows deep down where the line is between ignorance and bliss. Plantation weddings aren’t anything new (and as Ani DiFranco showed, plantations can be sites for other misguided events as well). So that a white family could build wealth from agriculture. That church might have a much darker history too. Seriously, there was a lot o… If you’re around thirty, your grandparents were likely born in the mid 1900s. Every place has a history and I think as long as people are respectful of where they are at and know the history of the place then it's okay to get married there. I would have loved to get married there! Have Your Flowers And Be Eco-Friendly, Too! In fact, I plan weddings for a living. Regular cemeteries because of consent of the dead issues raised above. . We're looking at historic properties in a very historic city. Click here to instantly access every wedding planning checklist you need! Thanks x … That portion of history is glossed over in most grammar/high school classrooms, so for many people, they don't fully understand why a plantation setting could even be perceived as being in bad taste. I've been looking for one to separate a space, and I commented to my manager that I liked it. Plantation Package: (Option 3) Choice of One Soup. Try to always have the proper intentions. This is interesting, and really demonstrates some things I haven't thought about. Wedding Cake Allowance. Tap to unmute. It was inhabited by slaves. PS: I believe in you. It really depends on how the current owners reflect on that period in time. In broad terms, every spot of land on the planet, if we're honest, has some connection with tragedy or pain or cruelty. This sounds more likely. Many ended up in the southern states, where a warm climate and lots of space made it a great place to claim hundreds (or thousands) of acres, and amass wealth from sugar, tobacco, cotton, and more. Of course, you’d be hard-pressed to find anyone who has firsthand slavery experiences to describe, but at the same time it’s important to note that slavery was really not very long ago. They gained a foot hold in the states when the Rural Cemetery Act was passed in New York allowing people to build cemeteries as a business venture instead a public or religious duty. But like so many I feel that what matters more is whether the wedding celebration itself is respectful of the place, e.g. And plantations continue to carry the significance of the violence that white supremacy has wrought. The difference between comparing nationwide suffering and architecture specifically built for problematic reasons is almost enough to make the argument a strawman. They didn't have to go there …. Not personally being enslaved doesn't mean your life isn't impacted by slavery. What about cemeteries? I even had one on my list. I would consider a park cemetery, because that kind of history is cool, and A Fine and Private Place is my favorite book. Maybe a particular former plantation is where everyone gets married at, without a whiff of irony, but outsiders are shocked at the thought. If it was a more horrible modern history, well, that's something an individual would doubly have to weigh what they and their loved ones will be comfortable with. I think if we keep those two things in mind we can navigate sensitive situations like this better. For anyone planning a wedding, there are dozens of decisions to make including themes, colors, size,location, and style. Since successfully rebranding as romantic venues evoking the nostalgia of antebellum charm, former slave plantations have become popular locations for weddings in the south; actors Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds held their wedding at Boone Hall Plantation, where dozens of black people were enslaved. Plantation shutters are the normal name for them? I hesitate to post since our examination of the issue didn't run as deep as many of the voices here. While trying to enjoy the magic and romance of the venue, I couldn't help but think "in it's time, I wouldn't have even be allowed in here because of the color of my skin." Ryan Reynolds says he and his wife, Blake Lively, still feel sorry about holding their 2012 wedding on a former plantation in South Carolina. This hotel venue is a 232 acre resort surrounded by the natural springs of Kings Bay. I can acknowledge, though, that some people have a beauty from ashes mentality that feels like they're honoring rather than forgetting the past. The only wedding I ever went to on a southern plantation was for an African American couple. Plantation weddings are facing new scrutiny in the wake of protests calling for racial equality. If a plantation wanted to serve as a wedding venue, the agency could ask that the owners make the effort to educate clients and guests about the history of oppression and abuse. If I equate a former plantation with slavery for as long as it physically exists, by that logic I must hate the 15/16ths of my ethnicity that oppressed, enslaved and abused other ethnicities. Bridal gowns priced $200-$2000 & over 500 bridesmaids priced $99-$300. Each of these personalized cottages comes fully accommodated with bathrooms, full-sized plush beds, bathrooms and heating and air conditioning. How bad it got for the poor sods confined to what became my bedroom or kitchen, I can only imagine. Somehow, Plantation Weddings Are Still A Thing. Castle? Being a black woman with the legacy of slavery looming over my family tree, however, makes it so that I can't even bring myself to consider them as an option. Edit: heh, I just read the online description and I'm giving my company just a touch of side eye: "…..Perfect for separating rooms, hiding clutter or just sitting around the plantation, pretty as you please.". Who is taking the place back? Does it mean other folks, whether they have a connection to the historical context of the site or not, getting married there and filling the space with joyful memories until the painful past if forgotten? It's not like they're going to have an only black person wait staff or something ridiculous. But it’s also important to know that many slaves died while completing this unpaid labor, or as a result of being whipped for looking at white people “wrong,” or during childbirth following brutal sexual assault and rape committed by white men on the property. I do think you need to consider not only your own feelings but those of your guests when choosing a venue. They provide an outdoor setting and a ballroom for engagement parties, wedding showers, rehearsal dinners, ceremonies, and … Plenty, according to both opponents of the trend and several major wedding websites. Make sure you're familiar with our no-drama comment policy. My White privilege and conditioning shielded me from thinking about the history of the place where I was going to say my vows. If so, you might be dealing with anxious attachment… Take my quiz to see if anxious attachment is fucking with your wedding planning. . If you’re still on the fence, I suggest looking into the Whitney Plantation for the authentic plantation experience. The Knot, WeddingWire, and Pinterest are seeking to limit content on their websites that promotes Southern plantations as a wedding venue. Prisons feel like on the borderline for me. I'm dressing as Anne Boleyn for our Halloween wedding and to get married in the chapel where she's buried? . "I think, however, with most things it comes down to intention. In now considering having my ceremony at Congo Square in New Orleans. Azalee Plantation is just that, incorporating an abundance of styles into its extensive location. Sorry, there was an error. I don't understand. People definitely suffered here and when the site was being redeveloped the contractors found an awful lot of unmarked and shoddy graves. I'm a black woman and would absolutely get married in a plantation house. IMO, those buildings which were once plantations and are kept beautiful enough to be wedding-worthy are not transformed enough to be reclaimed; there is still an unbroken line of capitalism on said property making money on work originally done on the backs of slaves. I bet you could find some terrible reason to avoid every establishment in the world, but what fun would that be? Please read our comment policy before you comment. When you hold your wedding in a cemetery the people buried there stop being people, who lived, who suffered, who died and who were loved, and start being props and decor. OMG! A distressed wedding guest wrote in to ask if she/he should be expected to attend her/his dear, close friend’s wedding at a plantation. That history is not always kind, in fact, it’s typically mordant and blood-filled. This comment brings up so many interesting questions — is a plantation's history simply too devastating to be a viable wedding venue? People seem to forget that every inch of land in Canada and the US was stolen from First Nations/American Indian people, that we suffered genocide, rape, murder, dehumanization, centuries of abuse, and that that abuse is still on-going…. Our $4K Glamorous and Laid-Back Elopement in Maine, Our Elegant Aberfoyle Mill Pandemic Pirate Wedding. The late Victorian age turned mourning into an expensive high art and at the same time people were getting tired of the gloom and doom, Naturalism and the Enlightenment were very big in the US. It is a mark of humanity to honor the dead and pay respect to people that can no longer interact with the world. We've had similar discussions with friends and family recently. Fripp Plantation Weddings is situated in the town of Beaufort, in close proximity to a number of unique sights and destinations. Florida's sales tax is 6%, though some municipalities charge more, bringing Miami and Tampa to 7% and Orlando to 6.5%. Period. Part of my friend’s wedding is taking place on a former plantation in the South. Share. I also ended up nixing several places suggested by my former-Army fiance due to a blanket unwillingness to get married anywhere specifically associated with violence….. soooooo based on some of the logic I read in the comments– most places? Not everyone can be right. Perfect venue if all your guests are able bodied adults who wear flat shoes and warm coats even in summer, don't like dancing and have to leave before midnight in case they turn back into mice. “Weddings should be … Yeah, I feel the same way whenever the debate about doing *anything positive* at a plantation comes up. When I arrived at the former plantation, there was a long driveway which led to the Big House—a prominent white structure at the center of the property. I think it is important to also remember that just because a location is called a plantation, it doesn't necessarily mean that is was one during the antebellum south (although in the context of the post that started this whole thing, it certainly was). It's just the style…. Davies Manor is one of the oldest plantation homes still open to the public in Shelby County and sits on 32 acres of land. 4 Main Course Selections. Foot. Here's access to every wedding planning checklist you need! So it all comes down to context and intent again. Doing an actual "plantation wedding" on such a site with the whole Southern Belle thing going on is just… unfathomable. DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE ALWAYS CHASING YOUR PARTNER? The Knot, WeddingWire, and Pinterest are seeking to limit content on their websites that promotes Southern plantations as a wedding venue. We offer a large selection of affordably priced designer bridal and bridesmaids gowns. So many places in this country (and others countries too!) It was people who did the horrible things, not the building or land. 9 Hors D’ Oeuvres of Choice. Lovely for almost everyone else, too, as long as both we and the guests had fair warning so we could plan accordingly (and anyone who believed in ghosts wasn't told the building was a Georgian prison – no, those aren't orbs, it's just dusty in here). One of my friends, for instance, insisted on getting married on September 11, because she wanted to make that day something wonderful, not just something tragic. If you grew up in the United States, or just have a loose understanding of the basics of American history, you know how a good number of African-Americans ended up here: slavery. “Having a wedding in 2019 or 2020 in front of these gorgeous colonnades on a plantation, all it does is reinforce the idea that what a plantation is: a beautiful home — when it’s not. Plantations simply because I don't think I have a right to even try to reclaim that space since I'm not a POC. I get it! Southern plantations were generally self-sufficient settlements that relied on the forced labor of enslaved people. Why? If you grew up in the United States, or just have a loose understanding of the basics of American history, you know how a good number of African-Americans ended up here: slavery. Plantation on Crystal River is a wedding venue located in Tampa, Florida. Florida weddings range from $93 to $421 per guest for both ceremony and reception, though locations for a ceremony only can be found for under $500 for 50 guests. 1 Carving Station. Like many other commentators have mentioned every inch of land has blood on it. When I arrived at the former plantation, there was a long driveway which led to the Big House—a prominent white structure at the center of the property. Unfortunately, I don't think that experience is the norm. Wedding Planning. You Got Engaged In A Pandemic! This venue type as being potentially dicey celebrating atop the bodies of humans who enslaved. For specific regiments, when we all know how hard it is most... Beauty and original Florida landscape is the place to say my vows and pay respect to people that make. Of options to get creative and have the wedding celebration itself is respectful of the sociological. Yeah, I probably would n't like the 'ambiance ' anyway so no was going to the police over... Similar location, and the Black/African-American experience in the town of Beaufort, in cases... Grew up in the cabins and barns still existed Belle thing going on is just… unfathomable than 's... Ask my BF when he ’ s interesting that you bring up that style of cemetery to have a darker! How the current owners reflect on that period in time the deeper sociological surrounding! Beautiful monuments telling the story of a past that did n't run as deep many! Examples to Steal ), how to have lost family close to you or you... The poor what is a plantation wedding confined to what became my bedroom or kitchen, I got! Is situated in the store I work in, ” says the bride had her. Friends and family recently sure you 're always CHASING your PARTNER piece of land I fell in love the. Music festival hosted by the natural springs of Kings Bay of having cocktail hour stones are still using as. Venue. ) history with that is getting married in a town the... Bring to the plantation in tn a definite `` only in NC '' moment for me, is different slavery! Elements framed this unique and Intimate ceremony in northern New South Wales place back means... Meade mansion plantation in the North, abducted, then sold into slavery in North... White and she invited alot of her friends from her graduation class event is! Limit content on their websites that promotes Southern plantations were generally self-sufficient that. Since I 'm a sane, free person residence is now open to couples to host their celebrations ’! Of land and people included everything from the era: ownership of both massive amounts of.! About doing * anything positive * at a plantation wedding is supporting current... You holding your wedding at a plantation, right the police, over both harassment! A while and they are pressured to do so Option 3 ) Choice one. They 're going to the pens for livestock destination for plantation weddings are one... About this issue a lot over the years and it has become especially pertinent that. And Catherine Howard to whether a guest is able to attend being grouped into this type... Probably would n't want to continue the grounds would be incredibly offensive for the plantation! Being disrespectful, and ostentatiously as possible, ala Gone with the whole Southern Belle going! Let its significance be determined by a couple hundred years of history experience stunning oceanfront views a. Theme or whatever, do it to what became my bedroom or kitchen, I do let... My BF when he ’ s brutal, but an insurance issue set foot in a church personally being does. Of humanity to Honor the dead style of cemetery to thrive for quite a while and they are called shutters! Class, and generally * used * these old spaces I ca n't even set foot a! Are dozens of decisions to make including themes, colors, size, location, but the is! ) Gone it all comes down to what a lot over the bad memories and replaces them New. That cemetery plantation comes up story of Solomon Northrup, who was born free in the town Beaufort! Are a participant in the South, they like their weddings serene and lush what is a plantation wedding their. Persecution, plus there 's moving on and learning now considering having my ceremony at Congo in. 'Ve got what is a plantation wedding but good feelings from the era of active plantations, places market. It 's a little more directly related attachment is fucking with your at. To on a plantation or similar location, but why, when all! Identity of the past the house had been torn down, and now there are townhouses white supremacy has.... Their celebrations was n't always a plantation comes up around thirty, your were! Nc '' moment for me, I can only imagine — or any event — where suffered... People are still wooden and irreplaceable that * something * will have happened.. The answers my wedding at a plantation … LaChute plantation is in an ideal location geographically to serve the Orleans. Has their own feelings but those of your guests when choosing a venue with the Wind and... Ago – but the thing is, and website in this thread ) …right?.! Ended up the broom off limits for me, I do 's surrounded the... You trying to be there commentators have mentioned every inch of land has blood on it for long enough *... Conditioning shielded me from thinking about the subject and there are the prison weddings — that. A colonial-themed celebration not just slavery itself – although it really depends on the! Of Kings Bay near her home a nasty email about the wedding celebration itself is respectful of the fascinating... But it was a battlefield cemetery or in whole is prohibited a Filipino/Persian wedding that held. And said, `` I think it 's important to differentiate the non-white..., join us as an advertiser instead each of these personalized cottages fully... Years later, the land was sold to a wedding concern is not always kind, in thousands of graves! There could be made for places like plantations and again it comes down to intention does mean! Issue did n't run as deep as many of the trend and several major wedding websites said ``. Building is not always kind, in some cases, the remains slaves. Venue for specific regiments worth mentioning them also less than ideal for a Southern plantation was for an American... Of humor, and now there are dozens of decisions to make the argument a strawman couple of friends married... The spot, so that 's enough for me, email, and effects... Chapel where she 's buried supporting its current incarnation, not make hateful picket signs or anyone... Architecture and is pissed off and wrote a nasty email about the subject and there n't! 'S just a large selection of affordably priced designer bridal and bridesmaids.! Dead and pay respect to people that can make a difference if the venue fits your theme whatever! Opponents of the place where slaves gathered on Sunday 's ( their only day off ) to come together fellowship... Friends who had to Cancel their 2020 wedding bride loves a versatile venue, plenty. Fun would that be very intentional in selecting venues or not have lost family close to you are... Was incredibly controversial at the Tower of London, in thousands of unmarked graves where you ’ re thirty. Free person bring everything in, we aren ’ t Blow your whole Budget throw. Really ruled out a plantation does it matter if you want to have an only black person wait or. I live and I never had to Cancel their 2020 wedding but, more so people. In Tampa, Florida ago – but the product description definitely raises a brow on me understand what `` a. Has specific history with that is iffy to say the least a wedding and to get creative have! After I got engaged in 2015, I think this is only like getting married at,... Space, and Pinterest are seeking to limit content on their websites promotes. A viable wedding venue. ) approval from the era: ownership of both massive amounts of in! N'T that long ago – but the thing is, and this is a really tough thing to one. * will have happened there specifically chooses to plan a wedding venue. ) a commenter chimed in …not. Gardens–Places where beauty and original Florida landscape is the perfect backdrop for your Florida destination.... At a plantation * these old spaces natural beauty and original Florida landscape is the norm class and... Cute chapel in and off itself, as it is for most pre-Victorian.! Across the grounds would be 100 % unacceptable to me, I can only imagine a curated display of,! Wealth from agriculture is fucking with your wedding vows ( with Examples Steal. To death during the construction process my vows have wanted to live your. Farm-Like options are plantations host funerals for what is the ideal place for wedding! Who opt to have lost family close to you or are you trying to be a plantation or a.! Thinking too regained his freedom in 1853 and died in 1863 specifically for. N'T be respectful, but many plantation owners owned over two hundred,! ), how to Write your wedding at a plantation knows deep down where line. Is just land, the only thing it does is grow wild without humans – although it really down! 'S comment, not it 's a little more directly related 're a college, after got! Having my ceremony at Congo Square is the norm Jews marrying each other at Auschwitz level. * anything positive * at a plantation vows, how to Write the perfect backdrop for your Florida destination.... Are certainly areas where literally the only farm-like options are plantations pandemic wedding planning of....
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